Mark’s Kaddy Korner

This article was just published in Australian Golf Digest as Show up, Shut up, and Keep up - A Veteran Caddy’s take on Tour Life. The article definitely looks better in the magazine, they added some great pictures and made my writing look good. 

Aussie Players and Caddies on the PGA Tour

In 1988, my first year on the PGA Tour, there was a handful of Australian golfers on the tour. Norman was dominating, “Elkie” was an up and comer, Wayne Grady was steady, Ian Baker-Finch could find fairways back then, and David Graham showed up occasionally. They were all great players, Greg had Steve Williams on the bag, the rest of the crew used American loopers.

Over the years, dating back to Joe Kirkwood Sr. Australian golfers have racked up close to 125 wins, including thirteen majors. Bob Charles, hopefully it’s alright to include him, Bruce Devlin, Peter Thompson, Bruce Crampton, and Jim Ferrier have left their mark on the PGA Tour, but there never was the influx of Australian players and caddies like today. Starting in the mid 90’s a trickle of players and caddies found their way to the States, and this year there are approximately fifty Aussies and New Zealanders playing on the PGA and Nationwide Tours.

Everyone can look up the scores and the accomplishments in the record books, but the unique stories about tour life reveal the human side of the sport. There has been a bunch of fun over the years, some trials and tribulations, and a bit of tension among the ranks. All the stories can’t be told, there is a locker room mentality out here, “What happens on the course, stays on the course” and we don’t want to throw anyone under the bus.

We had some fun back in the late 80’s and early 90’s. Two of my buddies, Brad Whittle and Russ “Pinecone” Craver worked for “Grades” and “Finchie” so we spent quite a bit of time together. Some Sundays, when there was short trip to the next tournament, we’d load them and maybe Elkington in “Betsy”, the Whittle’s beat up old van. “Betsy” was held together by bailing wire and duct tape with exhaust fumes seeping through the rusty floorboards. We’d fill up with oil and check the gas every couple hundred miles while they sipped on some cold beverages in the back. Laughing, choking on fumes, and enjoying the stories about tour life were a great way to spend a Sunday afternoon.

They tried to teach me finer points of Cricket and I explained baseball to them whenever we went to a ballgame. One night in Orlando we came very close to jumping a flight for the Bahamas and a Cricket match, but the beer talk subsided and we watched it in Wayne’s basement. The boys had their dancing shoes on at Brad’s Atlanta wedding, and my daughter, Cassie, spent the night dancing with everyone, but drug Ian out to the dance floor more than anyone. He had a way with the young ladies.

It seems like all the boys from “down under” love to have a good time, but at times the grizzled PGA veterans weren’t very hospitable. Don January stood up in a player meeting and voiced his opinion, “anything we can do about these f%#$*@g foreigners? We don’t need them over here.” He voiced the opinion of many tour players who thought foreign players had no right playing over here on a regular basis. This was their tour and their money to win; they didn’t like foreigners pilfering their coffers.

The animosity flourished as more and more foreigners invaded the PGA Tour. At Torrey Pines the INS agents appeared on a regular basis checking visas, passports, and creating quite a stir in the caddy ranks. Disgruntled American caddies, who had lost jobs to foreign caddies, were the INS informants and openly bragged about their phone calls to the Immigration Services office.

British, Spanish, and Australian caddies without the proper papers were detained on a couple of occasions. The jail cell was punishment enough, but when you had to spend time with Seve’s boisterous caddy, Ian, that was more than anyone could take; the “Brit” barely escaped assault charges after a few days in the cell block with Ian. He was the reason many foreigners sought the proper working papers; nobody wanted to spend another night in jail with Ian. It was tense for a few years but a truce developed in the mid 90’s.

Tony Linguard and Muenster were two of the first caddies, other than Steve, to legally migrate stateside. Tony came over with Sean Murphy and Muenster followed Glen Day from his years on the Asian Tour. Tony eventually hooked up with Shawn Micheel and won the 2003 PGA. They’ve been on again off again over the years, but Tony has always been a mainstay in the caddy yard, and a charmer with the girls. It’s not his good looks; it’s definitely the accent.

In a Chattanooga bar late one afternoon a local young lady gazed across the beer taps and swooned, “Can I take you home with me? Nothing sexual, I just want to listen to you all night.” We had a good laugh and Tony’s ego was only partially shattered. There are quite a few young ladies gathered around the practice these days, they’re not looking for Tony, but Matt Jones, James Nitties, Adam Scott and few others have a nice stable following them.

From 1993 to 2007 I called the Champions Tour home and ventured onto the PGA Tour a couple of times a year. Graham “Swampy” Marsh and his caddy Nick DePaul introduced me to a new golf gambling game, “Best Breasts”, and the game was quite competitive whenever we were paired together. It was a simple game; only cost the loser a dollar, but it sure filled the gaps between shots.
In Hickory, NC, from a distance I picked out my winner, pointed her out to “Swampy” and he said, “No, those won’t win it.” As I approached the green my jaw dropped when I realized my choice was “Swampy’s” fiancé. They were both good sports and she actually considered it a compliment.

We messed with Bruce Crampton quite often, he wasn’t a caddy favorite. Off the course he could be charming, but between the ropes, if his medication wasn’t right it could get ugly. Bruce Devlin corrected me once when I was defending Bruce, “He’s always been a horse’s behind; I grew up with him he’ll never change.” One favorite trick was sitting our bag over a sprinkler head and watching Bruce search the fairway for the missing yardage marker. We had trouble keeping a straight face, our players wondered why were giggling like little kids during the round.

A Texas state trooper stopped me on I-10 west of San Antonio, and after he checked me out, wrote me a warning and decided I was alright, he told me a story. “I stopped a golf pro a few months back, he was a real asshole, and I gave him a ticket. I can’t remember his name but he sure was a pain.”
“Does Bruce Crampton ring a bell,” I asked.
“That’s the guy,” the trooper said. I laughed all the way home and told that story many times.

Only Bruce Devlin has injured a caddy over here, and that was accidental. He politely tossed a club toward his distracted caddy and the club head caught him in the mouth knocking out a couple of teeth. It was the same week “Devil” won his last event so the ten per cent winner’s check paid for the dental work. Most of the guys are pretty easy to work for, but they can all get cantankerous at times.

At the 1992 Muirfield British Open Wayne Riley and his American caddy Mark Crundon waged a war of words in the English tabloids. There was some sort of disagreement on the course, Wayne fired Mark, and then called him a drunk in the papers. Crundon fired back the next day claiming Wayne drank as much as any caddy and the headlines read “I’M NO DRUNK”. The tabloids documented their squabble all week; the riff was headlines in the sports pages.

These days it is pretty sedate on the PGA Tour but we still manage to have some fun. Paul Gow is the main antagonist and his foil is usually the diminutive Gavin Coles. There will be signs along low gallery ropes warning Gavin to duck as he walks from green to tee. During a tournament someone, guess who, positioned a miniature toy plastic car in Gavin’s parking spot. Someone took a picture that travelled the internet for awhile. When Gavin heard about it he took out his anger on the course and almost won the 2008 St. Jude’s Classic in Memphis.

Out on the course it’s all business these days; you just can’t mess with the money. John “Robo Pro” Senden only utters about a dozen words per round, but he’s filling his pockets. There are a lot of serious faces and not much conversation between the ropes. In the early 80’s Steve Williams and his buddy Irish would do a couple of laps in the Royal Selangor CC pool when they made the turn.

It was always hot at the Asian Tour’s Malaysian Open so they would cool off, clothes and all, while their players walked to the tenth tee. The manager caught on after a few years, kicked them out of the pool, and ruined their fun. There is probably a plaque by the pool these days honoring Steve. No caddy, especially Steve, can afford to have that much fun during a round. We usually have to wait till after the scorecards are signed.

“Bullet Bob” had a tough week with Elkington and decided to resign after Sunday’s round. Steve and Robert “Caddy Killer” Allenby are hard on their caddies; great guys off the course but oh so difficult between the ropes. They’ve been through a lot of good caddies over the years. Gypsy, Bullet Bob, and quite few others have benefited from “Elk’s” charity off the course and felt his wrath during the tournament. Steve usually rents a house each week because of his allergy conditions, puts his caddy up for the week, and signs a very good pay check. They spend nights cooking gourmet meals, drinking cold beer and good wine after their tension filled days on the course.

At Pebble Beach last year Bullet quietly removed his caddy bib after the round, placed it on the bag while Steve was signing his scorecard, left a short note on the back of pin sheet, and walked away. The note read, “I f*%&#@g quit”. The divorce was quick but they will probably unite again, they’ve had some great tournaments together. In the late 80’s Steve fired the best round I ever witnessed, a 61 in the final round at Endicott after a bogey on the first hole. Bullet was on the bag.

A lot of the caddies came out for a few weeks and decided to make it a career. These days Vegemite is next to the peanut butter and jelly in the caddy wagon; you hear “g’day mate” often, and rugby is on the tube more often than baseball. The invasion is complete but cordial these days.

“Mick” managed a bar in Wrigleyville and he was Glen Joyner’s drinking buddy. Glen needed a caddy for three weeks, “Mick” volunteered. That was seven years ago and “Mick” is now the tour’s Aussie social coordinator, ring leader, whatever you want to call him. He’s always holding court in the caddy wagon, practice tee, or putting green. If there’s a big Cricket match or football game scheduled, Mick finds a place to watch the game. In Jackson, MS he convinced the owner of a local sports bar to keep a room open after hours so his mates could watch a big match. The Aussies didn’t fare well that week on the course; you have to have your priorities.

He’s working for Jarrod Lyle these days after Jarrod’s brother had to resign the position, and when Mick isn’t at the course he’s searching out establishments to watch Cubs baseball, Australian Rules football, a Cricket match or a gathering spot to quench their thirst. They found Reilly’s in Hilton Head the year Peter Lonard won the Heritage, and spent some long nights with Peter watching their beloved football.

Many of the players have established homes over here and become very active with the local charities. Russ Holden, Caddy for a Cure chairman, says “Badds”, Appleby, and Adam Scott all participate with CFAC. “They are all great guys; I worked for Aaron at Carnoustie, stayed with a bunch of Aussies, and had a great time.” That seems to be the general consensus about the herd of players and caddies from down under.

Adam Scott and Aaron Baddely have adopted a couple of Greg Norman’s old caddies. Tony Navarro works for Adam and Pete Bender loops for Aaron. They are all very dedicated to each other and “Badds” has been very supportive during Pete’s battle with cancer. He’s back on the bag now but it was touch and go for awhile. Without Aaron’s support Pete may not have made it back on tour.

Pete and Tony have been out here forever. Their stable influence has helped the youngsters through some growing pains on the PGA Tour. You can tell both players are most appreciative. They lean on them during the difficult times plus look for their input during clutch decisions on the course.

The mutual support was very evident during two of the most difficult moments on the PGA Tour. In 1998 we all lived Stuart Appleby’s pain when he lost his wife, Renay, and Stuart, along with the other Aussies, gathered Payne Stewart’s family in their arms, supporting Tracy and the kids during his untimely death in 1999. The outpouring during each occasion brought the players together and their collective grief created almost a familial bond that is still evident today. Out of the pain and misery everyone realized people and families were the most important aspect of tour life.

When Stuart received permission from Tracy to wear Payne’s signature “plus fours” outfit during the Tour Championship the Aussie and American bond was solidified. Like the rest of the world the PGA Tour has grown closer with their foreign neighbors; it’s no longer a closed society.

If your one of the best players, or caddies, in the world you belong over here; and, the Aussies definitely belong. Only Norman has won the money title, three times; it looks like this year there could be another Australian at the top, Geoff Oglivy. Mark Lye won the 1976 Australian Order of Merit, that will be safe for awhile, we don’t venture down there enough anymore. We enjoy your company here in the States.